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Emotional Rescue
Somebody
once described smoking dope as like ‘turning the volume of the senses
up’ and it’s fair to say that
when we’re under the influence we become
acutely aware of our environment how it looks,
sounds, smells, and feels. Often when enterering
a place or meeting someone for the first
time when stoned a sort of sixth sense would
seem to kick in and I would either feel comfortable
or uncomfortable picking up the ‘vibrations’ around
me. Heightened sensory
perception always seemed like a pretty good
reason for smoking
dope, but like many things in life what you
gain with one hand you lose with the other.
First
of all, if you’re stoned most
of the time then you no longer really notice
your heightened senses, everything pretty
well feels the same, and that’s a clue;
As your senses are
heightened so your feelings are numbed.
Your feelings are another word for your emotions
and it wasn’t until
I stopped smoking dope that I realised to
what extent I had been numbing out how and
what I was feeling emotionally.
One
of the things that kept me smoking dope
for so long, was how angry I became when
I tried to stop. Like many dope smokers I
never saw myself as an angry person, but
then again I never allowed myself to feel
any uncomfortable emotions at all. I had
many reasons to feel sad, scared, worried
and frustrated, but it was so much easier
to smoke dope all day and take refuge in
my heightened senses than allow myself to
accept how I was feeling at any given time.
Supressing my emotions in this way also supressed
my energy. I seemed to be tired most of the
time, living with a sort
of low level depression, my anger tended
to leak out and I was generally bad tempered
and irratable without addressing any underlying
problems.
One
of the greatest pleasures to be gained
from stopping smoking dope is being able
to recognise and accept ones emotional state whether angry, happy, or simply bored and
then react in an appropriate way. Because
our general state of mind is clearer, and
yes calmer, without the constant dope buzz.
By simply taking the time to name what we
are feeling we can train ourselves to welcome
it and fully experience it without creating
more pain and frustration to ourselves and
others.
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